All of us disillusioned also remain inside, especially the ones that have spent a lifetime at this game, because it's what our 'normal', it's what 'speaks' to us; we've made lifelong friends, and if to boot the immediate/extended family is 'inside' also, then it's much more difficult to walk away.
Do not be sad, though, we make it work so that we find happiness in our status.
In the Spanish side is quite easy to be 'awakened', inside and still be happy because we culturally speaking are very gregarious and fun-loving, always some type of a party and we have such a good time at those occasions.
It works for me, it just does. No need for pity here.
DY